Exhaustion waits for No One

After a fun filled working mini-vacation I am truly and extremely exhausted.

Let me tell you, no one cares. Don't take that the wrong way, of course my family and friends have sympathy. Of course everyone I know would like me to get some rest and feel more myself. It's the world at large that I mean is uncaring.

Deadlines cannot be missed due to "sleepiness", for that matter neither can work. You also cannot keep your child home from school because YOU are tired. Children cannot be ignored either. Folks frown at you if you don't feed and change them regularly.

So here I face working with a child not my own, getting my child to and from school, creating lists and coming up with solutions for one of those things that just happens. All the while pushing through this gelatin-like wall of total exhaustion. I still am not done.

I need to be creative despite this and create an announcement worthy of those being recognized for skill and good deeds. This is while my brain winks in and out. This is while my eyes fight to close on me. Yes, I can usually whip something out with only a few minutes leeway, but the Dread Monster Tyred has me by the sore joints I call shoulders and refuses to let go. I must succumb to it sooner or later. I know I won't escape.

Yet I keep pushing for later and later. Just let me get through my list and I promise that I will lay my head upon the pillowcase that desperately needs to be washed and fall asleep hoping that there is one more set of clothes I can wear tomorrow.

I do all this because I've made promises and I have a plan for my future. For both of those reasons I know I will fight this same fight again. Relatively soon I am sure. In the end it will be worth it. At least this is my Mantra. I will get myself and my group to where we need to be. This hard work, the days filled with dragging, yawning and extra food, will find us all successfully happy and with at least a couple extra hours a week to sleep.

In truth I am not complaining. I just need to let these feelings of frustration and general crabbiness out. That way I remember that Mantra and can continue to push forward no matter the obstacle of the day.

Am I crazy? Absolutely!