I mentioned on Friday that my son and I were going to a weekend long tournament for our medieval/renaissance re-creation group. First, I have to say that it was a lot of fun camping and hanging out with friends. Second, I must mention that I was nervous as all get out because I had to herald. Yes, the whole standing up in front of large crowds and loudly making royalty's wishes known. (Did I mentioned I have a fear of public speaking?)
Because I was so nervous I was making a big fuss out of my eight year old son fighting in his first real tournament. (Thus the impulsive shopping.) For the record, I am happy that he has found something he has fun doing and that he sticks with. I am also very happy that he chooses to join me when I play in this game instead of staying home with Daddy. I just work really hard not to put any pressure or expectations on him. After all it's supposed to be fun AND I don't want to be a "football-mom". So when I caught myself doing this I walked away and let him just play with his friends.
When time came for the Youth tournament to begin, I made sure he had everything that he needed on him and with him. I will admit I was short with him when his nerves made him whine at me because my own nerves were strung tight. (What a pair we were.) Then I stood back and took video while he went through inspection and waited for his turn to fight. I was so proud that he was paying attention, that he didn't complain when they changed fighting styles in each round and that he fought well no matter what size kid he was fighting. He was even so focused on making sure he accepted every blow he got that when he hit himself, he gave his opponent the kill. (Did I mention that he's eight?) Luckily for him the Marshal, (referee), told him that the blow didn't count and to continue fighting. I even had to laugh when several people surrounding the eric were cheering him on and yelling out instructions. (I wasn't by the way, the whole no pressure thing.) It was great fun to watch and when it was over my son said he had a blast. This was obvious as he was grinning from ear to ear. The tournament was exactly what we expected, good experience and fun for him. That was a great end to his first tournament.
Now it was my turn for the biggest and longest court I've ever been herald for. MY tournament, so to speak. We began a little later than planned, there were a lot of scrolls to sign at the last minute. Oh boy! That meant there were a lot of scrolls for me to read. Thankfully, I had gotten to see most of them and got a translation for the one written in Latin. (I do not read Latin, I was not going to start this weekend.) After calling several people forward to get their awards and reading the beautiful handmade scrolls they were given to go along with said awards, I was given a surprise. I was told to read a scroll without calling the person receiving it first. I started reading it and as I scanned ahead, so I wouldn't trip on upcoming words, I saw my son's name. Pushing through the tightening of my throat and the blurring of my eyes I finished reading. My son was named the most Chivalrous Youth Fighter in the tournament. Somehow I missed him leaving his seat and coming up to the thrones. I just looked down and he was there, grinning fiercely. He was excited! I was overwhelmed. After that, finishing court was not as scary. (Even though I lost my train of thought and started laughing out of turn. Whoops!)
This wasn't an official award. This was something that the young lady running the Youth Tournament wanted to recognize. Acknowledgment of a quality we all strive to display in our game. I found out later that several Noblewomen were asked to watch the tournament to choose who displayed this quality. These were women that might have seen my son in passing but really didn't know us that well. So we are both truly humbled that he was recognized for his thoughtfulness and sense of fair play. My husband does not play the game with us but even he is proud and humbled that his son was recognized in this fashion. Even three days later my son is still talking about this and asking if he can take his prize and scroll in for Show and Tell tomorrow. I did forget to mention, the prize was a purple and fluorescent green dragon that is about the same size he is. I don't think the dragon will make it to the school.
On to the real point of this story.
My son has a learning disability, he has difficulty with symbols and language. With that he has suffered with feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem. I have battled with friends, family and educators about his behaviour and sensitive nature. The boy is brilliant if stubborn. Unfortunately his intelligence has only shown through to others in his art and mechanical skills.
In dealing with all this my son works really hard to make sure he doesn't hurt others feelings and to make sure he is being helpful. I think it's because he knows how it feels to have others look down on him and because he wants to feel some sense of worth. I realize that he isn't always thoughtful or helpful, he is eight after all. For a boy his age, he is remarkably more consistent about it.
As happy as our SCA friends and acquaintances were for my proud Mama moment. As proud as they were that one of our children was awarded this honor. They do not know how much more this award means to us. At least they didn't before now.
I am so very grateful to those Noble Women who saw in my son the Gentleman I've always known existed.
To the remarkable young lady who decided that this quality and behaviour needed to be recognized: Thank You!
